***SPOILERS***
Do not read if you haven’t seen the movie.
Once again, Tyler Perry leaves me with mixed feelings. You can predict everything about the plot, all men are evil, etc……… but at the same time I am just so very entertained by the end. This cast is definitely his best. And I’m actually gonna go out there and say this may be his best film (previously I would have said The Family That Preys). But “best film” when talking about Tyler Perry really just means “least embarrassing”. Tyler Perry is undoubtedly a horrible filmmaker, and a predictable and shallow writer. But somehow he still pulls you in. He literally will write every bad thing that could possibly happen into EVERY MOVIE. Maybe he should listen to Mary’s “No More Drama” before writing his next one.
Despite all his faults, when Tyler Perry releases a film I always feel I MUST watch. Maybe it’s just because *we* don’t have anything else to watch……. But anyhoo, here were my thoughts while watching “For Colored Girls”:
- Who the hell is El Naheem?
- How can Whoopi be so expressive without having eyebrows?
- Michael Jackson is a bad bish! Did u see them shoes? That donkey? Werk Michael! I mean Janet.
- So….. u just gonna tell her she making u dinner next time? CHEAP MAN ALERT. Run girl.
- Kimberly Elise has never had a happy moment in her entire life. Ya’ll shoulda just let her go ahead and die. There is really no point in her living. She been crying since Set It Off. That girl just can’t catch a break.
- Old boy just READ Thandie and her entire life. “This is some sick shit….it can’t be healthy…… If the disease ain’t in your body, it’s in your head”. LMAO. Maybe she just shoulda took the $80 and rolled with it. She was gon give it up anyway…..
- Why don’t alcoholic men in movies ever shave? Does alcoholism cause you to want to be unkempt?
- Did you put those tattoos on Darnell to make him seem more menacing? Because just being a rapist wouldn’t have been bad enough?
- This probably shoulda been based in the 60’s. People referring to themselves as “colored” in 2010 just doesn’t make sense. Giving it up in a BUICK is also way worse in 2010 than it would be in 1965.
- Claire Huxtable is the nosiest neighbor ever! Just breaking in folks apartment all willy-nilly.
- Phylicia- you stay opening people’s apartment doors ANY other time, but now that kids are dangling out the window you can’t get in?
- Little girl if you don’t run out of Macy Gray’s dirty ass apartment RIGHT NOW!!!!
- I’m pretty sure people don’t have to get back alley abortions anymore, even when they are broke.
- Awwww, shit. He’s gay. So let me guess…….she’s gonna get HIV. Never saw that coming. *rolls eyes*
- Sooooo…… u not even gonna attempt to explain to this crazy negro that the guy in the front is just the driver? I mean at least attempt to verbalize it…with your sad face ass.
- Oh no! The paper got wet. Janet is gon’ whip your monkey ass for that one!
- Apparently Janet Jackson thought she was in “The Devil Wears Prada”. Or maybe that was the last movie Tyler watched on TBS before writing this part of the movie.
- Why is Phylicia Rashad talking about brown women with thick hips? Does she know she talking to Thandie Newton? We been watching Thandie in tiny clothes for 90 mins and I aint seen a hip yet…… not once.
- Loretta Divine just brings joy and life to every scene she is ever in. Love her!
- Is she pouring old chicken grease on this lil girl’s head?
- Kerry, what does this story have to do with your husband or your bad ovaries?
- At least it’s evil lightskinned dudes in this movie and not just evil darkskinned dudes. That’s a step up for Tyler, no?
- That Tyler Perry always did have good taste in men…..mmmmm-mmmm
- I’m guessing at least 65% of the viewing audience does not understand this poem right now.
